Saturday, 9 June 2012

Tips for Training Your Two Legged Ones by Groucho

TIP NUMBER ONE - TRAINING THEM INTO ALLOWING YOU EXTRA TIME ON YOUR WALK When I'm out walking, I adopt the attitude that this is MY walk and I will only RETURN WHEN I WANT TO - it has taken me YEARS of patience and hard work to teach the Two Legged Ones that it's not all about them, this is MY walk so a few pointers - 1) ignore them when they call (there are a few examples of how to do the 'sorry, I didn't hear you call my name as I'm too busy ignoring you' AND my 'oh, I heard you call my name but I'm going the other way anyway'tips below) 2) if this doesn't work and They start to becoming impatient, tetchy, do a lot of rolling, zoomies and playing with other four legged ones and, generally, looking as appealing and cute as you can - They don't have the heart to keep yelling out 'Groucho, here' when They see how much fun I'm having. Now, I'm sure that most of you out there have already mastered this training tip but just in case you haven't, I wanted to share. By the way, in the interests of transparency and honesty, I have to say that it doesn't ALWAYS work but if I achieve a success rate of 70%, I'm ok with that! Happy weekend. Woof for now. Groucho

13 comments:

brandi said...

You are so smart!

~Shelle said...

You should do more of these tutorials. We have the ignores down... like its second nature... but the rolling zoomies... well, you've taught us something new. :)

Gonna have to try this next walkie.

Milo (stepping in for Shelle, Dixie and Newby who are sleeping in on this lovely Saturday)

scotsmad said...

Groucho, you've got that one right. We're good at the ignore, in fact, sometimes we appear deaf. The 'anvil' is also good if you're on the lead and THEY want you to keep going. Just sit, stiffen your legs and refuse to move until YOU'RE ready.

Unfortunately She usually has a pocketful of treats....so what can you do...

XXXOOO Daisy, Bella & Roxy

Hoke said...

First...thanks for writing to my peeps but they will not let me walk alone. Something about not knowing how to come back and called and trying to run away or chasing the groundhogs in my nana's yard. And actually it's been hot here and they won't take me out when it's hot...as if I'd melt. Ok about the meatballs. Can you believe that they had meatballs for dinner and I didn't get a thing. I mean just because i was laying in the other room doesn't mean that I didn't want one. By the time I got up she was already putting them in a bag to freeze. Now as for you staying away from them when they try and catch you...it works!!! I use the "I don't hear you" all the time...but it fails when I hear the word "treat" ...that word has magic powers and makes me forget what I was doing. So does the leash (I have a fenced in back yard) so when I'm out there and I hear that leash clicking, I also forget cause it's hypnotic and it tricks me into coming right to her. Do you have any hints for how to avoid the evil magic?!?!

Molly The Wally said...

Groucho you are dog after my own heart , we are two of a kind! Will follow you with great glee!
Best wishes Molly

Scrappy said...

good tips.

i need to try the rolling zoomies - those look way fun!

it is sometime easier to train humans than we can ever truly admit

shhhhhhhhhhhh

Sweet William The Scot said...

Well my personal tip is you must under every circumstance smell every blade of grass particularly if it is raining and they want to get inside.
Sweet William The Scot

Susie and Sidebite said...

Well said, we ignore mom all the time, dad gets our attention , cause he either has food or is going to play with us.

Nice to meet you Groucho, with that name you must be related to Bites

Susie & Sidebite

amie said...

Groucho, you have got them trained! We're staying tuned for more tips!
Love, Joules & Prescott
http://fearthebeards.wordpress.com/
http://schnauzerschenanigans.com/

Oskar said...

Excellent tips, dude! The cuteness factor can be our ace in the hole.

Nubbin wiggles,
Oskar

Molly The Wally said...

I have passed on the fabulous ‘Sunshine Award’ to you! Please pop over and scroll down to the award post and collect it.
Best wishes Molly.

Shelle Pennington said...

We gaves you an award...
http://simpaticodreams.blogspot.com/2012/06/sunshine-award.html

Shelle, Milo, Dixie and Newby,
http://simpaticodreams.blogspot.com/

Groucho said...

Thank you soooo much to Wally and Shelle for my wonderful award!!! I will post it soon and answer the questions and award to others - I'm just a bit constrained right now as the She Two Legged One is very busy at work again and STILL hasn't bought me my own laptop!

Thanks again - I'm very touched!

Woof.

Goucho